Opinion
Could You Be Abusing Someone on Behalf of a Narcissist?
Today is World Narcissistic Abuse Awareness Day. Yes, believe it or not, it is a real thing. And it hurts.
We are all good people, right? At least, deep down, I hope we believe that; I mean, what person would intentionally, consciously, go out of their way to hurt and destroy another human being?
We probably have all been in contact with a narcissist at some point in our life. Maybe a boss. A friend. A neighbor. Or like me, even a member of your own immediate family.
Narcissists are very smart and calculating. They have had to be; they have been doing this for a very long time. They are self-absorbed, controlling, intolerant to others and their needs, and insistent that others see them as they wish to be seen, even though their front is a façade. “Victimized narcissists” can say hurtful things, but if you dare say something back to defend yourself, you are the enemy and considered abusive. There is no sense in debating with a narcissist; they will shift the blame at all costs. They will never see things through your eyes; they are incapable of reflection or feeling empathy. For this reason, sadly, they don’t have the conscious insight that we do to know that they exhibit this behavior.
Narcissists will suck the life out of you and leave you struggling to breathe. Narcissists don’t care that they pit one family member against another, even sibling against sibling if the narcissist happens to be a parent. Yes, the most excruciating pain is the reality that moms and dads can also be narcissists, leaving their children sometimes hating each other. And the one that dares to speak out to this abuse is left feeling defeated, battered, and bruised by the people they love most in this world even though the wounds are invisible to the naked eye (which is another reason why innocent people get caught in the trap of defending the narc).
And if the relationship becomes so intolerable with a narc that you are forced to make a painful decision of quitting your job, moving, ending a friendship, getting a divorce, or even going low or no contact with one or both of the people who brought you into this world, you become public enemy number one; the narc will attempt to destroy you and your reputation at all costs.
“Narcissist’s will DESTROY your life and erode your self-esteem. They do it with such PERSUASION that you are left feeling like YOU are the one letting them down.”
A narcissist’s public persona is very important to them, which is why they don’t publicly attack you—that would make them look bad. Instead, they carefully choose people in their circle to be their puppets. The narc delivers believable-sounding lies to sympathetic ears, ones that can be easily manipulated. Of course, very decent, loving, caring individuals can be caught in the trap of the narcissist and innocently become what is called “flying monkeys.”
A Flying Monkey? Up until a few months ago, I had never even heard the term. But I felt attacked from all directions and so on my quest to understand and survive this abuse I found this in Wikipedia and finally it all made perfect sense. The complicated pieces all came together in my mind: “Flying monkeys is a phrase used in popular psychology mainly in the context of narcissistic abuse. They are people who act on behalf of a narcissist to a third party, usually for an abusive purpose. Flying monkeys are distinct from enablers…. Enablers just allow or cover for the narcissist’s (abuser’s) own bad behavior.”
This is a phrase made popular by the movie The Wizard of Oz—the Wicked Witch sent her flying monkeys after Dorothy and her friends. In most cases, it is a humorous way of saying “Don’t make me come after you.” But there is nothing humorous about being hated and harassed by a flying monkey on its mission to destroy an innocent person. It is unfair, cruel and causes more pain to someone that is already struggling.
So, beware.
You may be a flying monkey if:
You find yourself believing gossip, even though the facts don’t add up.
You are an adult, yet you take sides, instead of staying impartial.
You are mad, stop speaking to someone and possibly hate someone else who has done nothing to you at all.
You accept someone’s version of the truth although you have no first-hand knowledge of the story.
You believe that the one you are defending is the only one deserving of sympathy.
You are overly involved, feeling the need to defend at all costs.
You are attacking someone else over something that quite frankly is none of your business.
And what should you do if you are on the receiving end of this hatred and smear campaign either from a narcissist or their flying monkey?
It is easier said than done sometimes, but keep calm and do not engage. DON’T ENGAGE. The narc is looking for you to react. It gives them fuel. Strength. Power. And they hate nothing more than the silent treatment, as they are then not getting their narcissistic supply.
Breathe. Ignore it. Read books and articles on narcissism. See a therapist. Write. Cry (it does make you feel better). Cry some more if you have to. Heal. Keep breathing.
Live a beautiful, healthy, productive, and happy life and don’t look back. Narcissists hate that and it does make them angrier. But don’t do it out of spite; do it because you are entitled to that. You are. And never let anyone make you feel guilty or beaten down or ashamed that you choose to do what is best for your life.
We are all responsible for our choices and behaviors and the consequences. Knowledge is a gift and you can always change. Say sorry. Forgive. So, if you believe that you have unintentionally been used by a narcissist as their flying monkey, what you do with that knowledge is up to you.
But know that, moving forward, what you do now IS intentional and conscious.
Jodee Prouse is a Sister. Wife. Mom. Friend. And outspoken advocate to help empower ACOA’s through their journey of life; trauma, truth, addiction & breaking free from family chaos to live YOUR best life. She is the author of the powerful memoir, The Sun is Gone: A Sister Lost in Secrets, Shame, and Addiction and How I Broke Free. To learn more visit www.jodeeprouse.com
Daily Caller
‘Holy Sh*t!’: Podcaster Aghast As Charlie Kirk’s Security Leader Reads Texts He Allegedly Sent University Police
From the Daily Caller News Foundation
The person in charge of the security detail for Turning Point USA (TPUSA) founder Charlie Kirk says he warned Utah Valley University (UVU) police about access to a rooftop days before Kirk’s assassination, shocking podcaster Shawn Ryan on Monday.
Kirk was assassinated during a TPUSA event at UVU on Sept. 10, during which he was debating attendees. Brian Harpole of Integrity Security Solutions read Ryan texts during the episode of “The Shawn Ryan Show” of him allegedly flagging for UVU’s police chief the rooftop used by Kirk’s alleged assassin on Sept. 8, two days before the assassination.
WATCH:
“We have some correspondence with the chief of the school uh on that day, on Monday, before Charlie was killed and why this hadn’t come out and why he won’t stand up like a man and admit this, I don’t know, but he’s watching a bunch of men lose their careers and he’s okay with it,” Harpole told Ryan. “On Monday before, this correspondence went to Chief Long. ‘Hello, Chief Long. We received this message today from the student group. ‘There is a student roof access pretty close to where CK will be set up at the Utah Valley. (The Sorenson Center has a couple of staircases that go up to walkways on the roofs.)’”
“He comes back and the so, for edification, the Sorenson Center was the building in front of the Losee Center and so, he comes back he says you want uh access to the roof and came back and said I was told students have access above us,” Harpole continued. “If this is true it would be nice to either have it controlled access or allow one of my guys to be there as well if possible. He comes back and his last correspondence was, ‘I got you covered.’ What else am I to do when a command level person from an accredited police department says, ‘I’ve got this area.’?”
Text exchange between Brian Harpole and UVU police official. (Screenshot/YouTube/Shawn Ryan Show)
“That was the chief of police for the UVU Police Department. We’ve called him. He’s never called us back,” Harpole added as Shawn Ryan responded by saying “Holy shit.”
UVU did not immediately respond to a request for comment from the Daily Caller News Foundation.
Video released of the immediate aftermath of the assassination of Kirk shows the alleged gunman making his escape by dropping off the roof and fleeing. Authorities arrested Tyler Robinson, 22, early on Sept. 12, accusing him of fatally shooting Kirk.
“Probably literally all they had to do is post anybody at that stairwell,” Harpole said.
From the Daily Caller News Foundation
Unelected regulators and bureaucrats from the United Nations have pushed for crushing the global economy in the name of saving the planet.
In October, the International Maritime Organization (IMO), a specialized agency within the U.N., proposed a carbon tax in order to slash the emissions of shipping vessels. This comes after the IMO’s April 2025 decision to adopt net-zero standards for global shipping.
Had the IMO agreed to the regulation, it would have been the first global tax on greenhouse gas emissions. Thankfully, the United States was able to effectively shut down those proposals; however, while these regulations have been temporarily halted, the erroneous ideas behind them continue to grow in support.
Proponents of carbon taxes generally argue that since climate change is an existential threat to human existence, drastic measures must be taken in all aspects of our lives to address the projected costs. People should eat less meat and use public transportation more often. In the political arena, they should vote out so-called “climate deniers.” In the economic sphere, carbon taxes are offered as a technocratic quick fix to carbon emissions. Is any of this worth it? Or are the benefits greater than the costs? In the case of climate change, the answer is no.
Carbon taxes are not a matter of scientific fact. As with all models, the assumptions drive the analysis. In the case of carbon taxes, the time horizon selected plays a major role in the outcome. So, too, does the discount rate and the specific integrated assessment models.
In other words, “Two economists can give vastly different estimates of the social cost of carbon, even if they agree on the objective facts underlying the analysis.” If the assumptions are subjective, as they are in carbon taxes, then they are not scientific facts. As I’ve pointed out, “carbon pricing models are as much political constructs as they are economic tools.” One must also ask whether carbon taxes will remain unchanged or gradually increase over time to advance other political agendas. In this proposal, the answer is that it increases over time.
Additionally, since these models are driven by assumptions, one would be right in asking who gets to impose these taxes? Of course, those would be the unelected bureaucrats at the IMO. No American who would be subject to these taxes ever voted for the people attempting to create the “world’s first global carbon tax.” It brings to mind the phrase “no taxation without representation.”
In an ironic twist, imposing carbon taxes on global shipping might actually be one of the worst ways to slash emissions, given the enormous gains from trade. Simply put, trade makes the world grow rich. Not just wealthy nations like those in the West, but every nation, even the most poor, grows richer. In wealthy countries, trade can help address climate change by enabling adaptation and innovation. For poorer countries, material gains from trade can help prevent their populations from starving and also help them advance along the environmental Kuznets curve.
In other words, the advantages of trade can, over time, make a country go from being so poor that a high level of air pollution is necessary for its survival to being rich enough to afford reducing or eliminating pollution. Carbon taxes, if sufficiently high, can prevent or significantly delay these processes, thereby undermining their supposed purpose. Not to mention, as of today, maritime shipping accounts for only about 3% of total global emissions.
The same ingenuity that brought us modern shipping will continue to power the global economy and fund growth and innovation, if we let it. The world does not need a layer of global bureaucracy for the sake of virtue signaling. What it needs is an understanding of both economics and human progress.
History shows that prosperity, innovation, and free trade are what make societies cleaner, healthier, and richer. Our choice is not between saving the planet and saving the economy; it is between free societies and free markets or surrendering responsibility to unelected international regulators and busybodies. The former has lifted billions out of poverty, and the latter threatens to drag us all backwards.
Samuel Peterson is a Research Fellow at the Institute for Energy Research.
Chinese-Owned Trailer Park Beside U.S. Stealth Bomber Base Linked to Alleged Vancouver Repression Case
US Nuclear Bomber Fleet Shares Fence With Trailer Park Linked To Chinese Intel-Tied Fraudster
McKinsey outlook for 2025 sharply adjusts prior projections, predicting fossil fuels will dominate well after 2050
Laura Ingraham Presses Trump On Allowing Flood Of Chinese Students Into US
-
Alberta2 days agoATA Collect $72 Million in Dues But Couldn’t Pay Striking Teachers a Dime
-
Media2 days agoBreaking News: the public actually expects journalists to determine the truth of statements they report
-
Artificial Intelligence2 days agoAI seems fairly impressed by Pierre Poilievre’s ability to communicate
-
Business2 days agoCarney doubles down on NET ZERO
-
National2 days agoWatchdog Demands Answers as MP Chris d’Entremont Crosses Floor
-
Business2 days agoLiberal’s green spending putting Canada on a road to ruin
-
Alberta16 hours agoCalgary mayor should retain ‘blanket rezoning’ for sake of Calgarian families
-
Alberta13 hours agoNational Crisis Approaching Due To The Carney Government’s Centrally Planned Green Economy