Opinion
Could You Be Abusing Someone on Behalf of a Narcissist?

Today is World Narcissistic Abuse Awareness Day. Yes, believe it or not, it is a real thing. And it hurts.
We are all good people, right? At least, deep down, I hope we believe that; I mean, what person would intentionally, consciously, go out of their way to hurt and destroy another human being?
We probably have all been in contact with a narcissist at some point in our life. Maybe a boss. A friend. A neighbor. Or like me, even a member of your own immediate family.
Narcissists are very smart and calculating. They have had to be; they have been doing this for a very long time. They are self-absorbed, controlling, intolerant to others and their needs, and insistent that others see them as they wish to be seen, even though their front is a façade. “Victimized narcissists” can say hurtful things, but if you dare say something back to defend yourself, you are the enemy and considered abusive. There is no sense in debating with a narcissist; they will shift the blame at all costs. They will never see things through your eyes; they are incapable of reflection or feeling empathy. For this reason, sadly, they don’t have the conscious insight that we do to know that they exhibit this behavior.
Narcissists will suck the life out of you and leave you struggling to breathe. Narcissists don’t care that they pit one family member against another, even sibling against sibling if the narcissist happens to be a parent. Yes, the most excruciating pain is the reality that moms and dads can also be narcissists, leaving their children sometimes hating each other. And the one that dares to speak out to this abuse is left feeling defeated, battered, and bruised by the people they love most in this world even though the wounds are invisible to the naked eye (which is another reason why innocent people get caught in the trap of defending the narc).
And if the relationship becomes so intolerable with a narc that you are forced to make a painful decision of quitting your job, moving, ending a friendship, getting a divorce, or even going low or no contact with one or both of the people who brought you into this world, you become public enemy number one; the narc will attempt to destroy you and your reputation at all costs.
“Narcissist’s will DESTROY your life and erode your self-esteem. They do it with such PERSUASION that you are left feeling like YOU are the one letting them down.”
A narcissist’s public persona is very important to them, which is why they don’t publicly attack you—that would make them look bad. Instead, they carefully choose people in their circle to be their puppets. The narc delivers believable-sounding lies to sympathetic ears, ones that can be easily manipulated. Of course, very decent, loving, caring individuals can be caught in the trap of the narcissist and innocently become what is called “flying monkeys.”
A Flying Monkey? Up until a few months ago, I had never even heard the term. But I felt attacked from all directions and so on my quest to understand and survive this abuse I found this in Wikipedia and finally it all made perfect sense. The complicated pieces all came together in my mind: “Flying monkeys is a phrase used in popular psychology mainly in the context of narcissistic abuse. They are people who act on behalf of a narcissist to a third party, usually for an abusive purpose. Flying monkeys are distinct from enablers…. Enablers just allow or cover for the narcissist’s (abuser’s) own bad behavior.”
This is a phrase made popular by the movie The Wizard of Oz—the Wicked Witch sent her flying monkeys after Dorothy and her friends. In most cases, it is a humorous way of saying “Don’t make me come after you.” But there is nothing humorous about being hated and harassed by a flying monkey on its mission to destroy an innocent person. It is unfair, cruel and causes more pain to someone that is already struggling.
So, beware.
You may be a flying monkey if:
You find yourself believing gossip, even though the facts don’t add up.
You are an adult, yet you take sides, instead of staying impartial.
You are mad, stop speaking to someone and possibly hate someone else who has done nothing to you at all.
You accept someone’s version of the truth although you have no first-hand knowledge of the story.
You believe that the one you are defending is the only one deserving of sympathy.
You are overly involved, feeling the need to defend at all costs.
You are attacking someone else over something that quite frankly is none of your business.
And what should you do if you are on the receiving end of this hatred and smear campaign either from a narcissist or their flying monkey?
It is easier said than done sometimes, but keep calm and do not engage. DON’T ENGAGE. The narc is looking for you to react. It gives them fuel. Strength. Power. And they hate nothing more than the silent treatment, as they are then not getting their narcissistic supply.
Breathe. Ignore it. Read books and articles on narcissism. See a therapist. Write. Cry (it does make you feel better). Cry some more if you have to. Heal. Keep breathing.
Live a beautiful, healthy, productive, and happy life and don’t look back. Narcissists hate that and it does make them angrier. But don’t do it out of spite; do it because you are entitled to that. You are. And never let anyone make you feel guilty or beaten down or ashamed that you choose to do what is best for your life.
We are all responsible for our choices and behaviors and the consequences. Knowledge is a gift and you can always change. Say sorry. Forgive. So, if you believe that you have unintentionally been used by a narcissist as their flying monkey, what you do with that knowledge is up to you.
But know that, moving forward, what you do now IS intentional and conscious.
Jodee Prouse is a Sister. Wife. Mom. Friend. And outspoken advocate to help empower ACOA’s through their journey of life; trauma, truth, addiction & breaking free from family chaos to live YOUR best life. She is the author of the powerful memoir, The Sun is Gone: A Sister Lost in Secrets, Shame, and Addiction and How I Broke Free. To learn more visit www.jodeeprouse.com
Fraser Institute
Long waits for health care hit Canadians in their pocketbooks

From the Fraser Institute
Canadians continue to endure long wait times for health care. And while waiting for care can obviously be detrimental to your health and wellbeing, it can also hurt your pocketbook.
In 2024, the latest year of available data, the median wait—from referral by a family doctor to treatment by a specialist—was 30 weeks (including 15 weeks waiting for treatment after seeing a specialist). And last year, an estimated 1.5 million Canadians were waiting for care.
It’s no wonder Canadians are frustrated with the current state of health care.
Again, long waits for care adversely impact patients in many different ways including physical pain, psychological distress and worsened treatment outcomes as lengthy waits can make the treatment of some problems more difficult. There’s also a less-talked about consequence—the impact of health-care waits on the ability of patients to participate in day-to-day life, work and earn a living.
According to a recent study published by the Fraser Institute, wait times for non-emergency surgery cost Canadian patients $5.2 billion in lost wages in 2024. That’s about $3,300 for each of the 1.5 million patients waiting for care. Crucially, this estimate only considers time at work. After also accounting for free time outside of work, the cost increases to $15.9 billion or more than $10,200 per person.
Of course, some advocates of the health-care status quo argue that long waits for care remain a necessary trade-off to ensure all Canadians receive universal health-care coverage. But the experience of many high-income countries with universal health care shows the opposite.
Despite Canada ranking among the highest spenders (4th of 31 countries) on health care (as a percentage of its economy) among other developed countries with universal health care, we consistently rank among the bottom for the number of doctors, hospital beds, MRIs and CT scanners. Canada also has one of the worst records on access to timely health care.
So what do these other countries do differently than Canada? In short, they embrace the private sector as a partner in providing universal care.
Australia, for instance, spends less on health care (again, as a percentage of its economy) than Canada, yet the percentage of patients in Australia (33.1 per cent) who report waiting more than two months for non-emergency surgery was much higher in Canada (58.3 per cent). Unlike in Canada, Australian patients can choose to receive non-emergency surgery in either a private or public hospital. In 2021/22, 58.6 per cent of non-emergency surgeries in Australia were performed in private hospitals.
But we don’t need to look abroad for evidence that the private sector can help reduce wait times by delivering publicly-funded care. From 2010 to 2014, the Saskatchewan government, among other policies, contracted out publicly-funded surgeries to private clinics and lowered the province’s median wait time from one of the longest in the country (26.5 weeks in 2010) to one of the shortest (14.2 weeks in 2014). The initiative also reduced the average cost of procedures by 26 per cent.
Canadians are waiting longer than ever for health care, and the economic costs of these waits have never been higher. Until policymakers have the courage to enact genuine reform, based in part on more successful universal health-care systems, this status quo will continue to cost Canadian patients.
Energy
Canada is no energy superpower

This article supplied by Troy Media.
By Bill Whitelaw
And pretending otherwise is a fool’s game
Canada is not an energy superpower. Not even close.
The term has become a convenient political crutch, used as a slogan to signal ambition without doing the hard work of building a unified national strategy. It’s a hollow label, unsupported by clarity, coherence, or consensus.
But what does an energy superpower actually mean?
An energy superpower is a nation that not only exploits vast energy resources but also possesses the infrastructure, political unity, and global influence to shape international energy markets.
Right now, Canada has none of these. Instead, we are mired in political disarray, inconsistent energy policies, and missed opportunities.
This misleading label is further complicated by Canada’s political fragmentation. Provincial policies are often at odds with one another, preventing any coherent national energy strategy. Alberta’s economy remains heavily reliant on oil and gas, yet its policies clash with those of Ottawa, which is pushing for a green transition. Meanwhile, Quebec has imposed a complete ban on new oil and gas development, deepening the divide.
This disunity makes it impossible to speak of Canada as an energy superpower.
How can we be a superpower when we can’t even agree on our own energy future? The result is a country torn between expanding fossil fuel production and pivoting to renewable energy, but with no clear path forward on either front.
Moreover, the term energy superpower is also misleading because it suggests that Canada is already a leader in the global energy market. But we are not. We lack the internal coherence and strategic focus necessary to claim this title.
Rather than being based on a solid, coherent energy strategy, the superpower narrative is little more than wishful thinking—a convenient narrative used by politicians to appeal to certain voter bases, but without addressing the hard realities that true energy leadership requires.
These political rifts and contradictions translate directly into real-world consequences.
Canada has failed to build the infrastructure needed to efficiently move resources. Take, for example, the Trans Mountain pipeline, which has faced years of delays and massive cost overruns, and the stalled East Coast LNG projects.
These serve as prime examples of our inability to capitalize on our energy potential.
The Trans Mountain expansion was initially pegged at $7.4 billion, but it ballooned to over $34 billion by 2023, with no guarantee that the government will recoup that investment. Meanwhile, critical LNG export projects in Eastern Canada remain stuck in regulatory limbo, with no consensus between provinces or between the provinces and the federal government. These delays and cost overruns show that, despite having some of the world’s largest oil reserves, Canada has been unable to turn its potential into action.
Even the energy sector itself is deeply fragmented. Industry groups such as the Canadian Association of Petroleum Producers, Clean Energy Canada, and the Transition Accelerator all propose vastly different roadmaps for the country’s energy future. Some are focused on expanding oil sands and pipelines, while others push for a transition to clean energy. But there is no unified national strategy, and this lack of coordination, coupled with the failure to reconcile these conflicting viewpoints, undermines any claim that Canada is on track to become an energy superpower.
If we continue down this path, the superpower narrative will not unite the country. It will fracture it further, reinforcing existing polarization and distracting us from the real work that needs to be done.
Instead of embracing a vague label of “superpower,” Canada needs to prioritize real, substantive action: infrastructure development, clear policy frameworks, and consensus-building among provinces and stakeholders.
For Canada to become a true energy superpower, we need to invest in projects that support long-term energy security, environmental sustainability, and economic growth. This means not just exploiting resources, but doing so with the necessary infrastructure to transport and refine them efficiently.
We also need to build a national consensus that recognizes the importance of all energy sources—fossil fuels, renewables, and critical minerals—and how they can work together to support both domestic needs and international export markets.
Canada must stop using the energy superpower label until we’ve demonstrated the political coherence and infrastructure needed to back it up. Until then, we need to focus on building consensus and strategy for the future, so that when we do claim the title, it will be earned, not merely wished for.
Bill Whitelaw is a director and advisor to many industry boards, including the Canadian Society for Evolving Energy, which he chairs. He speaks and comments frequently on the subjects of social licence, innovation and technology, and energy supply networks.
Troy Media empowers Canadian community news outlets by providing independent, insightful analysis and commentary. Our mission is to support local media in helping Canadians stay informed and engaged by delivering reliable content that strengthens community connections and deepens understanding across the country
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